Just Fall...

I was thinking about Fall today. You know...Autumn, that wonderful time of the year. My mother and two of my sisters just LOVE fall. HH, TB, and mom were all born in October. So maybe it is in their make-up to love fall. I admit it wasn't ever my favorite time of year. But I loved it because they love it, and watching them find joy in the season makes me happy. Today was the first day of FALL. The air is a little cooler this week and it is actually starting to feel like fall. Soon we will have our "Chili" tradition...which I will write about when it happens. But I love that fall is here. What I wouldn't give to have another fall afternoon with our mom, all around the kitchen table, eatting her homemade soup or chili and talking for hours.

That reminds me of another FALL...

Did you ever play that game of trust as a kid? Someone would stand behind you and you would FALL backward into their arms. It takes a lot of trust to fall straight back into someone's arms without trying to stop or 'save' yourself. My sisters and my mom...now those are some arms I KNOW I could always fall into. I could sure use one of them closer lately. I think I need to get on a plane and fly somewhere with changing leaves...I need some more FALL.

Bye Bye summer...you are actually my favorite season (I love my sister 'Summer' too!) See you next year! Hi fall...thanks for all those crisp memories of mom raising all of us! You might be 'cool', but the memories will keep me warm 'til Christmas.

Life is short and precious. Make it a great day! ONLY YOU CAN!

Warm Memories...

I have this memory as a child of my mother standing in the kitchen in our first house...I couldn't have been more than 4 (I know this because we moved on my 5th birthday exactly...and I ate all the peppermint candies on the cake my grandma made me...as we drove to our new home 2 hours away...might as well have been 4,000 miles to a 5 year old.) Any-who... I was reflecting on this memory of my mother today. She was standing in front of the hot kitchen stove making something magical. NO, it wasn't my favorite meal...it was homemade playdough. I remember storing it in an old bread bag. I guess there wasn't ziploc bags back then. I loved the feel of it, and actually though I believe playdough to be very messy...playing with it always brings back these warm memories of my mother, standing there in front of the kitchen stove...doing what every WONDERFUL mother does...take the ORDINARY...some flour, water, salt, etc...and making the EXTRAORDINARY! That was what she did for us our whole lives...she took the ordinary and made it extraordinary. Our friends loved to come over to the house because mom made warm memories...whether it was freshly baked chocolate chip cookies, my Big Brother's Favorite Blue Berry Muffins, or popcorn in the cast iron skillet...or in this case, warm, right off the stove, playdough.

I tried to recreate a little of that "magic" my mother seemed to stir up with such little effort (from my vantage point anyway). The kitchen was hot, my hands burned a little as I kneeded the dough and got it ready for the children. BUT OH THE JOY! For a moment I wasn't mom ordinary...I was mom EXTRAordinaire. And that is a wonderful feeling I hope each of you have experienced. The simple became superb. I was watching my friends little darlings too and the nine of them all around the table playing with playdough was such a beautiful sight. The world goes too fast these days. Video games, online streaming, Xbox, Wii...I am not dissing them...but there is something to be said for a pile of playdough and a little imagination. Maybe I will raise some children that can generate a new thought, and in 25 years instead of seeing the third or four remake of Footloose, or Dirty Dancing we can watch something new.

Regardless of that, my greatest wish is that in 25 years my children will look back on today with warm memories and remember their mother in front of the stove throwing together some flour, water, salt, etc...and making magic. I hope I will be here to do it with them, I wish my mother had been here today. Maybe God let her have a little glimpse of the magic of it all. I certainly know that would have made her happy.

Life is short and precious. Make it a great day! ONLY YOU CAN!!!

2 cups Water (start boiling it)

1/2 cup salt (I only had sea salt so I added it to water and stirred until it was dissolved but if you have regular salt you can add it to the flour I guess...mine turned out great though)

1tsp Alum (I had this from the last time I made it, it is in spice section at grocery store...if you don't have it, but you do have cream of tartar scroll to next recipe)

2Tbsp cooking oil

2 & 1/2 cups flour

Food coloring of choice

I boiled water with my sea salt added. I then took a mug and put a little water, the alum and the food coloring. I mixed with a fork, dipped it in boiling water and scooped some out and swirled it around. Then I poured this back in a repeated a couple times to get all the alum and food coloring out. Finally I added the oil.

In a large mixing boil (if you have metal it won't stain like plastic can) I put the flour and spread it around the bottom of the boil. Set it on the table if it is metal...it will get hot. Carefully pour the contents of the pan that has been boiling evening over the flour. Then start mixing with a wooden spoon like crazy. Get it as mixed up as you can. When you can stand to pick it up (IT'S HOT!) star roll/kneeding fist fulls of it. Set aside once you get it smooth and grab another handful. I made three batches (3 colors of course). HAVE FUN! If you have cookie cutters they work great and will keep children entertained for quite awhile. Enjoy your WARM memories!

Haven't made this one because I didn't have cream of tartar so I made the alternate one.

1cflour,1cwater,1/4c salt,2tsp cream tartar 1 Tbsp veg oil, food coloring

Irony...

(Writing this felt like coming home...I stayed away too long...so here is the return of the Prodigal son/well daughter in this case.)

Life is full of Ironic moments.

My daughter (age 10) came to me on Labor day and wanted to let me know that it was "Very Ironic" that on Labor day...when we celebrate Laborers, most people don't work. I had a cute chuckle with her and we shared one of those...look each other in the face and give a silly smile moments.

But life itself seems so ironic. When we are young we want to be older. When we are old we want to be younger. It seems that so much of our lives are waisted on what isn't that we wish was, and what IS that we wish wasn't.

Losing both my parents before I was 40, and with my oldest child just turning 10 this year has set things in a little bit of perspective for me. Even if someone offered me a time machine and NO "Butterfly Effect Consequences", I can safely say that I have no desire to go backward or forward. My daughter also recently came to me with a little quote she heard on a TV show. Yesterday is History, Tomorrow is a Mystery, Today is a gift...That's why they call it the PRESENT! She was pleased with this discovery and reminded me (lest I forget) that we can NOT change the past. We need to live in the present and prepare for the future...and THAT is all we have control over. This was a good reminder, and a good life lesson in general. She is actually wise beyond her 10 years on earth. I guess that is an irony in and of itself...that the child teaches the parent. But it is not a first around here. It happens quite often. Maybe it is because I see my children as people, not possessions or objects to be moved around at my whim. They have marvelous ideas, they create, they explore, they learn so many things hands on. I am not perfect, but I try to step with care, and not extingush the passions that they came with naturally.

My greatest desire is to have a happy family...Happiness itself is not a DESTINATION...it is a journey (that is what my mom used to always say at least). But with my parents loss I have found my very existance at odds with my true desires. So I am battling...the hurts of the loss on one shoulder, the desire to be happy on the other. Anyone relate?

Today...I decided I don't want the sad. I can't control the tears, they come when they come. But I can choose to be happy or sad...I am choosing happiness. I am choosing laughter with the children, family time, silly faces, chicken salad sandwiches at the table for lunch, all together.

Life is short and precious...Make it a great day! ONLY YOU CAN!