Tuesday, March 15, 2011

Ambitions...

I read a blog today about the ambitions of a "stay at home mother" that was a member of my church. She loves her children but has a longing, a desire to do something more...to show them she is important and to be educated, and "do something". I think these are fine and noble goals. My ambitions are different. My husband, mother and niece went out of their way a few years back when I was nursing baby #3 to help me complete my degree. My units sat dorment for over five years...and the time was fast approaching that I would lose some of my credits if I did not secure my degree. With only 13 credits keeping me from my original goal and with my college two states away we evaluated the options. A wonderful counselor helped me over the phone to set up a plan. I had the foresight...I am sure it was the spirit...to take upper division classes both of my last semesters on campus. So I was able to fulfill all but one of the needed classes at a community college. What a blessing. I did not walk at graduation, but I have a beautiful, framed diploma thanks to my sweetheart. And we celebrated. The dinner my husband made was awesome and included some of my family from both my side and his...it was one of the greatest meals I have ever partaken of. I felt a surge of success in getting it done. Sure it took forever...but no one can take it from me. So I really do get this young mother's desire, yearning for something more. Maybe though I don't share her "ambition" because of what I was blessed with...here is my story.

I would be a heel if I didn't express my deep gratitude for what I have, what I enjoy, what I love. When I met darling husband I was almost 26 years old...that is like 37 in Mormon years (LOL...if you are Mormon you understand...if not you may or may not understand). I always loved the words that repeated in my mind when all my friends got married at 18, 19, 20 and I wondered if my time would EVER come...and I could here my German Foreign Exchange Sister in my mind telling me that they never get married where she is from before they are 30. And 30 is YOUNG!

Well, I did not wait until 30. After dating literally close to 100 boys during the college years...I was led through an interesting course of events to my wonderful husband. While dating we discussed future life and compared goals if this were to "go anywhere". He said, "I wouldn't want my wife to work, unless she wanted to. I would really love to have a family and have a wife that could stay home and raise our children. I would work three jobs if I needed to, to make that happen." I agreed that a mother was fundamental to the nurturing of a child, and though it wasn't the luxury every woman had, it was one that I would be most grateful for. I have not worked outside the home since I became pregnant with our first child. I assure you that I work. And it is hard work. But it is the work I chose, it is the work I love, and I am grateful to be afforded to do it. Just for the record, there was a time, when we were saving for and first in the house we occupy now that my sweet dragon slayer of a husband did just what he promised. He worked three jobs so that I would not have to leave the home. I am grateful to be a mother. I aspired to many things as a child...a teacher, a nurse, a doctor, a lawyer, an accountant...I get to do all of them...just for much less pay. But really the hugs, love and adoration of these five little ones really is priceless. My daughter used to say she was going to be a teacher, a hairstylist (like her auntie), a massage therapist, a pianist and a mom. But recently when I asked her what she wanted to do she said, "I want to be just like you." Of course my eyes welled up with tears. Naturally I tell her, great, so you are going to finish college and be a mom...that is wonderful! (because an education, as our church strongly emphasizes is important for women...and men too of course).

#297 Reason I see the hand of Heavenly Father in my life...this natural tendency to nurture didn't come from no where!

Make it a great day! Only YOU can!

1 comment:

The Mudmom said...

ditto, Ditto, & DITTO!!! It's all I've ever wanted to be too. I'm so proud to be a mom along side of you so we can work and grow together. :)